3rd stanza first line - these
not this
itd flow better + its proper english that way :o
also: bleh, friends
also also: read the entire thread about your memoirs of mc donalds x.x
but i dont post on the forums... like, ever (well rarely)
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Comments
Thanks for spotting the typo, I seem to make lots of those. I do know that it's supposed to be "these" rather than this, but meh, I'll change it later. Also, thanks for reading Memoirs, readers are always welcome :)
you didnt answer the friends part :s
friends?
...or else ill castrate you
lol ^.^
friends it is! :)
Nice Poem, Kibian!
thanks :)
Very good, quality poem!
thank you, I love writtng, though these kinds of poem I only write when depresed (naturally), which hasn't happened a lot lately
ERROR, ERROR. TOO DEEP, CANNOT COMPREHEND!!!
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
nice poem
sorbitol
Not bad!
Now let me try!
*ahem*,
Fish-fingers.
============
Golden breadcrumbs,
To this I succumb,
And within does hide,
The processed fillet inside.
On the box where I read,
A promise- well kept,
To better ones self,
Oils of Omega twelve.
Not only delicious
But also nutritious!
On my breath the stench lingers
Memories of fish fingers.
I hope it helps!
NemoX
I lol'ed.
thanks for sharing, I liked it :)